About Me

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I have recovered from the disease of Alcoholism. I believe there is only one person really,.. everybody. And that peace of mind is everything. -So treat your neighbor as you would treat yourself, because your neighbor IS yourself. I think most of recovery is what I would call common sense, but that learning to be ordinary is a true gift very few people acquire. My ambition is to accept everything unflinchingly, with compassion, and therefore be intrinsically comfortable in my own skin, no matter what. I am comfortable being uncomfortable and am willing to go to any lengths to improve my life. I believe the Big Book was divinely inspired, and is extraordinarily powerful. Unfortunately AA's best kept secret a lot of the time. (In my opinion). I just try to do what works, no matter what it is.

Wednesday, November 08, 2006

'Too good to be true'. Dealing with Success, and love from other people.

I saw this comment on tkdjunkie's blog. and LOVED it so I'm quoting it here.

tkdjunkie. said
'Blessings are often first greeted with resentment and suspicion. In my mind, anything that seems too good to be true is too good to be true. Anything that seems to exceed my expectations must be a ticking time bomb waiting to go off the moment I trust it.'

This is a NEAR PERFECT description of the (typically negative) 'alcoholic' reaction to success in life, and love from others.
Basically we HAVE A LOT TO LEARN about having a positive attitude to SUCCESS and RECEIVING LOVE from others.

I have found that the more 'success' I experience in recovery, the MORE I experience this type of thinking.

Success is tough!
Stuff like:.

I don't deserve this.
'When a person said they liked me, I knew one of two things. They were either LYING or they were STUPID.'
Fear of death
Fear of 'losing everything'
'a ticking time bomb waiting to go off the moment I trust it.' (tkdjunkie)
Paralysis because you think ANYTHING might trigger a 'collapse'

This is because we are habitually:
Negative. Cynical, fear the worst, expect 'the sky to fall in', distrust other peoples motives, think very little of ourselves and other people. Remind ourselves of our failures.

We need to learn to:
Think better of others and ourselves. Assume other peoples motives are GOOD, not bad. Assume we ARE loveable, even if we cannot see it at all. Say ENCOURAGING things to ourselves. Focus on the positive. Remind ourselves of our little victories.
Trust ourselves
Trust other people. (Well the nice ones anyway!) People are much nicer than we think they are!

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