To Sponsors. Step 5. Chamomile and Vetiver in an oil burner

Its not necessary, but I like using these for step 1 and 5 appointments.
I think they are beneficial to both sponsee and sponsor

Roman Chamomile 3 drops
Vetiver 3 drops

Possibly
Organic Lavender Rare 3 drops
Vetiver 3 drops

You will need an oil burner with a DEEP basin
Buy one from Culpeppers in Covent Garden

Essential oils from Fragrant earth.

Some night lights

(If you want an explanation) Subtle Aromatherapy book by Patricia Davis.

Also I like burning Sai Baba Nag Champa incense before the appointment.
Buy large packs from Watkins centre in Cecil court. WC2.

Either that or Holy Cat incense, But its more expensive.

Want some advice or feedback from a 'Wise Being'? Try Active Imagination!

WARNING. You motive for having this conversation should NOT be selfish.
If you want to 'better' your life, in ANY way shape or form,
It should be for THE BENEFIT OF ALL SENTIENT BEINGS
And NO other reason.
You have been warned!!!
Selfishness does NOT work well for you in the realm of the Spirit!!!
What goes around comes around and all that...
Also please be respectful when you do this.

Hmm. How do I explain this.... (without sounding like a lunatic!!)
As far as I am concerned, this is a step 11 'trick'.
This can be done by anyone, but I normally explain how to this AFTER step 9.

Basically you can talk to ANYONE.
Here's how

Personally I like to have a nice space to do this in. Its no different than when you have guests round for dinner. You want to have the place nice. Its not REALLY important, but it IS a nice thing to do.
Its not a ranting opportunity. More of a 'consultation'.
I instinctively feel like I ought to be very respectful when I have these consultations. I don't do them willy nilly. Even though I feel as though I could. I only do this if I feel I have something important I need to consult with them about. I do not want to be more of a drain on 'them' than I absolutely need to. I encourage you to be respectful of this process whilst at the same time, being as honest as you can.

Make a cup of tea, sit down and have a chat with a 'Wise Being'.
Out loud. Or in your head if you are more adept.
Just 'imagine' that there is a wise being there, and you are chatting to 'he/she/it'

Just see what happens..
Try it for, say 30mins or so to start with
But once you get the 'hang' of it, you can do it more instantaneously and for shorter periods.

Ask advice..
Questions..
What do you think of this? Type of thing..
Or what do you make of that?..
Or do you think I'm full of shit?..
Or Am I kidding myself about this?..
Or I just don't know what I'm doing here!..
Or what do YOU think I should do about this?..
Or will I EVER get better at 'x'......

Just about anything you like really..

The rule is BE HONEST.
NOT 'nice'

Tell the truth!
Be yourself!
Stop pretending!
Tell it like it is!
And listen!

Write down the 'feedback' that comes into your head AFTER you have spoken your 'truth', (for no other reason than) you will probably forget it if you don't.
Don't write it down at the time. Wait untill after the 'conversation' has taken place before you start jotting down the perceptions that come into your head.

Tell me how you get on with this because I always like hearing how this goes..

Disclaimer. This should BENEFIT you.
If for some reason you feel WORSE instead of BETTER after you have done this
Then as far as I am concerned. You are doing it WRONG. So please do NOT do it until I have had a chance to give you some corrective feedback.
So please consult me if this is not 'working' for you.

PS Active Imagination has its origins in the Jungian Tradition, but is mirrored in many other faiths and traditions. Basically its a universal truth as far as Im concerned, but I cant be bothered explaining it to be honest. Have fun!

Dalai Lama:Teaching & empowerment. Brittany 16th-21st July

138 quid for four days teaching. Or less if you just do the empowerment. Very cheap!
By the way. The empowerment is REAL. You will be empowered in ways that are new. Empowerment is pretty much the opposite of 'lack of power, that was our dilemma'.

Which is VERY close. Compared to having to go to India to hear him teach. That would be quite a cool holiday to go on if you can figure out some accommodation.
Hmm. I wonder can you camp nearby and cycle there? Probably easier to be in a B and B. they cant be THAT expensive surely?
Well there you go.
He's has a VERY powerful presence and is consummately brilliant at being ordinary. Amongst other things.
Don't expect to understand what he says. I think that would take quite a few lifetimes of study. It works even if you don't understand it though. Apparently.

And you get a cool empowerment on the last day!! Very exciting!

Empowerment of Padmasambhava

Weblink for Dalai Lama Frenh Teaching Here

Nuts and seeds from Covent Garden Tesco

...if you happen to be passing.

In my opinion they are of better quality and cheaper than both holland and barret and health food shops.

Also they have an EXCELLENT seed mix which can be eaten on its own. Its got lots of essential oils in.
The Tesco in covent garden has by far the biggest seed and nut range I have seen in the other west end tescos.
And nuts can be really quite expensive under normal circumstances, so its worth getting ones that are very fresh and crunchy.
The poorer quality ones can be soft, old or have moth type things in them if they are stored incorrectly. Holland and Barrett tend to be ok, but I think the tesco ones are cheaper and crunchier.

And last time I was in there, there was loads of really ok punnets of nectarines and plums reduced to 50p each. Which i don't EVER see at my local (kak) tesco.

Crosstrainer NOT treadmill

...but don't do more than 30mins at a time because otherwise you will get chunky calves.

Why? Because..
You burn MORE calories. You can burn 500cals in 30mins quite easily
No knee damage. Keep your feet close together on the plates to avoid knee damage.
Work arms as well as legs. We do NOT like bingo wings!

ALWAYS type in your weight because otherwise you won't know how many calories you are burning.

Cheese and Salmon have the same feel-good chemical as chocolate

Well salmon is out for me, so I rely on the cheese option.
The best low fat cheese is cottage cheese. Try it. I used to think it was rubbish untill I found a 'combo' that worked. See what appeals to your pallate. It's very low GI as well, so good for keeping diabetes at bay.

Add..
Honey
Honey and ground cinnamon
Honey and freshly ground nutmeg
(Baby food) sugar free apple and pear pudding and ground cinnamon
Honey and cashews (if you're feeling very decadent)

You could try mozzarella with tomato, avocado and vinigrette. This one's no good for me because I'll eat too much at a time. The cottage cheese option is better for me.

Buy one of there! They're great!

JMH550 - 18 oz Capacity!
Thermos Nissan Stainless Steel Vacuum Insulated Travel Tumbler

I got mine in the states, but you can probably get them over the internet. Heres a link
http://www.coffee-makers-espresso-machines.com/thermosnissan1.html
I found this for 25 dollars online. I could have sworn mine was cheaper than that. But hey. If you know someone who's going to the us and might be going to a 'mall' along the way, you can pick these up at typical kitchen-y shopping places.

There is NO comparison between this brand and the KAK ones you see in the shops here.
This retains heat for AGES, so your drink is like lava for many hours.
Also it does not leak or dribble.
Basically it id GREAT. Id get 2 if I were you, because they are a pain in the arse to get hold of and you end up using them a lot.

Weepy? Overwhelmed? Try the Taoist arch!

Stand with feet shoulder width apart
Or an comfortable pose
Bend the torso back, looking upward
Without excessive strain
Reach the arms out fully to the front, the sides, and behind the lower back
Breathe fully
Exhaling with a deep sigh of satisfaction or a warm expression of greeting and enthusiasm.

Excellent for emotional processing. This can be dramatic and forceful when the pose is held for a minute or more

Premarital Inventories as a Compatibility Test

I don't know if they 'work' as such, but they're better than doing nothing!

PREPARE/ENRICH Premarital Inventory
The PREPARE/ENRICH Inventory has a Christian perspective. Via 195 statements, the inventory targets marriage expectations, personality issues, communication issues, conflict resolution, finances, having fun together, sexual issues, parenting, dealing with family and friends, spirituality, and flexibility.

There are five versions available:
PREPARE for premarital couples
PREPARE-MC for premarital couples with children
PREPARE-CC for cohabiting couples with or without children
MATE for couples who are over the age of 50
ENRICH for married couples

RELATE - Relationship Evaluation Questionnaire
The RELATE inventory can be used for both premarital education and also for marriage enrichment. It has 271 items addressing issues of communication, conflict management, consensus building, family-of-origin, personality traits, and more.
An advantage to RELATE is that couples who are separated by distance can use the on-line premarital inventory individually.

Books of the same ilk.
1000 Questions for Couples: Test Your Compatibility and Find Out More About Your Mate by Michael Webb

Questions and Statements to Stimulate Premarital Couple Dialogue

PMI/RMI/VMI Marriage Inventories
The Premarital, Remarital, & Validating Marriage Inventories are available online for $25.00 per couple. It is a 170-item questionnaire that is available in both English and Spanish.

Questions for Engaged Couples

Online questionnaire

Online questionnaires from Marriage Builders.com

heres another

'Holding it together' means you are afraid of falling apart.

Which is not cool.
'Wellness' is much more fearless than that. Much more chilled out.
Fearless isn't a good word for me because my interpretation of that is that there is some degree of intensity in it. And intensity itself is pretty dodgy.
So when I say fearless, I mean easy going, non plussed, un fazed, not bothered, mild mannered, easy like Sunday morning, whatever, 'I don't see a problem with this' sort of thing.
we are NOT talking about Attila the Hun type of fearless here!

Freedom from fear is very cool and should not feel intense, in my opinion.
But do your lousy best. If the best you can do is to be fearless in a slightly 'acting as if' intense way, then fair enough. That will do for now.
But in the long term, we are aiming for a much less 'tense' internal environment. Being chilled out basically.

'Holding it together' displays some tension, which betrays your real fears underlying that bravado.
Trust me. the fear of falling apart or of annihilation are all pretty much bullshit. after step 9 anyway. IF you are keeping in good spiritual condition.

Like all suggestions, please use common sense with this.
Meaning if you have just moved to the other side of the world, started a new and very demanding job, split up with your husband, and haven't slept in 4 weeks, then do not choose THAT time to fearlessly look at what you think will make you fall apart.
Its always best to do work on ourselves when we are in good shape. not when we are run ragged! At those times we need to do much more simple stuff like catch up on sleep, and phone a newcomer.

Intensity is not 'well' and breeds fear

If you can't eat it in moderation. Avoid it altogether.

Perhaps wait till you get to step 9 before you try this. Its more of a long term goal than an early recovery thing.

Eat bland foods if you have a tendency to overeat
Un processed food
Fruit vegetables

Eat stuff like in the book 'you are what you eat'.

Basmati whole-wheat rice is ok.
Add marigold low salt stock
And liquid aminos for flavour
Sprinkle some linseeds on when its cooked. Or sunflower or sesame seeds.

Add pine nuts and raw sugar snap peas
Or curry powder, raisins and coconut. Perhaps a few cashews as well.
Or broken up omlette and cashews.
Or celery apple and cashews
Or tomato, cucumber, feta cheese and olives
Or tomatoes, celery and cucumber
Or tomato puree, chili sauce and kidney beans
Or some DECENT tofu brand. From better health food shops.
Or just some soy sauce
Whatever really

Add Omega 3 6 9 oil and freshly squeezed lemon or lime.

Go to the salad bar of a GOOD vegetarian health food place (or look at what even places like marks and spencer are selling) and get some ideas from the things they are serving

Avoid eating meat as much as you can

Apart from the fact that it can still be putrefying in your colon 20 years later, its bad karma. The food industry is positively evil in many ways, but is at its worst in the way it treats animals.

Roadkill is alright though. If you like that kind of thing! No ethical dilemma there!

But take cod liver oil for joint protection.
Dairy is ok. But stick to low fat and organic if possible.

Buy mixed nuts and seeds. Not the more-ish ones like cashews or pistachios.
Almonds are very good.
Put mixed nuts and seeds into smoothies.
The ones coated in 'yoghurt' are full of sugar and are very addictive.

Cottage cheese and parmesan is ok.
Watch out for high fat cheese. Use it sparingly if possible.

Eat GOOD oils
Almonds
Raw Avocados
Omega 3 6 9 oil from health food shops
Linseeds
Flax Seeds

Watch 'My Name is Earl'

Sometimes TV is good. Not very often, admittedly. But the good stuff is worth watching.

There's a lot of truth in the programme 'My Name is Earl' IN MY OPINION.
But even if there isn't, its funny and endearing.

Generally, comedy is GOOD. On TV or in comedy clubs. Its good therapy to teach you to laugh more and be more playful.
I personally like Harry Hills TV Burp, and The Pub Landlord.

Also
David Blaine
Derren Brown
I know NOTHING about magicians but I sometimes wonder about these two. They might have abilities above and beyond that of the regular magicians, or they might just be VERY good magicians. I have no idea. But I like watching them anyway.
These guys might not be as crazy as you might think they are. Try to watch them with an open mind. Personally, I have come across so many strange things that nothing surprises me. But I find both these people quite 'other worldly', (which I like). Check them out. There is no law against being eccentric or deliberately provocative on a spiritual path. There is plenty of room for paradoxes!
I'm not saying I understand them, because I don't,
but they are both very intriguing, that's for sure.
Trust me! There's PLENTY of weird stuff out there!!

NOT
Most haunted
Anything with derek akora in it
Charmed

Opening our Eyes to the Suffering of Others

This is a Buddhist Parable which is marvelous in itself,
but for me illustrates the internal world we (hopefully) visit in the process of doing Step 9.
Thank God we have done the first 8 steps before we are allowed to go back to 'the real world'. We need ALL the preparation we can get our hands on because we are naturally SO self centered, and generally pretty oblivious to the suffering of the people around us.
Although we may have learned of compassion through the work we do with newcomers, true compassion is experienced more readily when we visit the suffering we brought to others in step 9.
It just sinks in more or something.
Like most things in the programme, its almost impossible to describe.
You have to experience it to understand what I mean by that.

To me this is a story about SELF CENTREDNESS, and how it breeds ignorance of our surroundings and therefore an imbalanced view of the world. Self pity, or whatever else.

My experience in sobriety is that EVERYONE has a story, and that if you knew it, you would find it IMPOSSIBLE to hold resentments. You would feel nothing but compassion.

Anyway, hope you like the story..

Kisa Gotami had an only son, and he died. In her grief she carried the dead child to all her neighbors, asking them for medicine, and the people said, "She has lost her senses. The boy is dead."

At length Kisa Gotami met a man who replied to her request, "I cannot give you medicine for your child, but I know a physician who can. Go to Sakyamuni, the Buddha."

Kisa Gotami repaired to the Buddha and cried, "Lord and Master, give me the medicine that will cure my boy."

The Buddha answered, "I want a handful of mustard seed." And when the girl in her joy promised to procure it, the Buddha added, "The mustard seed must be taken from a house where no one has lost a child, husband, parent, or friend."

Poor Kisa Gotami now went from house to house, and the people pitied her and said, "Here is the mustard seed, take it!" But when she asked, "Did a son or daughter, a father or mother, die in your family?" they answered her, "Alas! the living are few, but the dead are many. Do not remind us of our deepest grief." And there was no house but some beloved one had died in it.

Kisa Gotami became weary and hopeless, and sat down at the way-side, watching the lights of the city as they flickered up and were extinguished again. At last the darkness of night reigned everywhere. And she considered the fate of men, that their lives flicker up and are extinguished. And she thought to herself, "How selfish am I in my grief! Death is common to all; yet in this valley of desolation there is a path that leads him to immortality who has surrendered all selfishness."

Putting away the selfishness of her affection for her child, Kisa Gotami had the dead body buried in the forest. Returning to the Buddha, she took refuge in him and found comfort in the Dharma.

Buddhism. Buddhaghosa, Parable of the Mustard Seed

Go here to learn BASIC Meditation Techniques

I recommend these classes as an introduction to basic meditation ONLY.
Once you have learned basic techniques, seek out the most senior and highly respected monastic you can find to continue to practice with. Ie. Stick with the winners
There are many classes and groups available and I will mention them in another post.

http://www.fwbo.org/

http://www.lbc.org.uk/

"Maybe good, maybe bad, who knows?"

A Taoist Parable of a Farmer

“The Taoist prefers to look at life events without judgment or interpretation. According to Taoism, the true significance of events can never be understood as they are occurring for in every event there are elements of both good and bad. Furthermore, each event has no specific beginning or end and may influence future events for years or even centuries to come. An excellent example of the Taoist view of life is found in the parable of the Taoist Farmer.

“There once was a Taoist Farmer. One day the Taoist farmer's only horse broke out of the corral and ran away. The farmer's neighbors all hearing of the horse running away, came to the Taoist Farmer's house to view the corral. As they stood there, the neighbors all said "Oh what bad luck!" The Taoist farmer replied 'maybe.'

“About a week later, the horse returned bringing with it a whole herd of wild horses which the Taoist Farmer and his son quickly corralled. The neighbors hearing of the corralling of the horses came to see for themselves. As they stood there looking at the corral filled with horses, the neighbors said "Oh what good luck!" The Taoist farmer replied 'maybe.'

“A couple of weeks later, the Taoist farmer's son's leg was badly broken when he was thrown from a horse he was trying to break. A few days later the broken leg became infected and the son became delirious with fever. The neighbors all hearing of the incident, came to see the son. As they stood there, the neighbors said "oh what bad luck." The Taoist farmer replied 'maybe.'

“At that same time in China, there was a war going on between two rival Warlords. The Warlord of the Taoist farmer's village was involved in this war. In need of more soldiers, he sent one of his captains to the village to conscript young men to fight in the war. When the captain came to take the Taoist Farmer's son he found a young man with a broken leg who was delirious with fever. Knowing there was no way the son could fight, the captain left him there. A few days later, the son's fever broke. The neighbors hearing of the son's not being taken to fight in the war and of his return to good health all came to see him. As they stood there, each one stated "oh what good luck!" The Taoist farmer replied 'maybe.'
Then he revealed the secret of his wisdom. "It is not for us to know what is good or bad. It is only for us to be fully engaged in the adventure of living, for how can we know what event is ultimately good or bad? That is the future and we can only know the now which is never good or bad, only part of the adventure. Who knows?"

Source: the internet.

I think I may have first heard this from a Buddhist monk or nun, but I managed to find a copy of it on the internet.

The moral of this story is, (in my opinion)
Do NOT (in your Arrogance), JUDGE a situation or event as being either 'GOOD' or 'BAD'
Because YOU DON"T KNOW WHAT YOU DON"T KNOW!!!
You are NOT all seeing or all knowing!

TRUST that your Higher Power knows what's best for you,
even if it makes NO sense at all to you at the time.

This is essentially a story about Arrogance,
and us thinking we know 'how the world should be'
or 'what is best for us'.
When you stop being Arrogant about what Gods will is for you,
you are able to accept the things that show up in your life
without 'having an opinion'
or putting a 'good' or 'bad' mental sticker on the event.

Our rock bottom is the BEST example of a seemingly tragic event,
which can transform us in utterly magical ways,
and fill our lives with grace and beauty.

Running to Stand Still

The Headless Chicken
The 'Hamster in the wheel' syndrome
Addicted to Busyness
Addicted to Perpetual Motion
Displacement Activity. (That's when you start cleaning under the cooker instead of getting on with Step 4)

Don't just DO SOMETHING, SIT THERE!

Be a human BEING, not a human DOING.

What are you afraid of? What is the hurry?

You can run, but you can't hide!
Whatever it is, you are postponing dealing with, has a nasty habit of following you around like a bad smell
and catching up with you eventually. Usually delivering a swift kick in the bum when you least expect it.

You NEED quiet time, to reflect upon your life.
If you don't?
Well, you snooze, you lose my friend.

Simplify your Life
Cut away the dead wood
Keep only the things which NOURISH you
(Thats includes friends, activities, old habits, anything really..)

Just for today I will have a quiet half hour all by myself and relax.
During this half hour sometime,
I will try and get a better perspective of my life.

-From the Invitation
I want to know if you can be alone
with yourself
and if you truly like the company you keep
in the empty moments.

Step Five Promises
We can be alone at perfect peace and ease.

Balanced Between Repression & Indulgence

We walk a VERY fine line between the two excesses of both Repression and Indulgence.
Both of which are WRONG
And lead to emotional imbalances

It is a balancing act you perfect, every day
For the rest of your life

There are no days off!

Invest in a Smoothie Maker and a Magimix

If you can afford them of course! Don't spend money you don't have!
For me these are the KINGS of the raw food empire!
Raw food delivers LOADS more energy than cooked food.

You need the Magimix to make carrot juice and to shred raw vegtables finely.
Also dammed good for grated parmesan.
Make sure you get one with a parmesan disc and juice extractor.

The Smoothie maker is for making raw fruit and vegtables easier to eat and is VERY filling.
Get a fairly robust one with a decent motor. At least 500v

Eating the Flesh of our Ancestors

Is the Buddhist term to describe what happens when we do things that are bad for our body

Such as
Eating poisonous foods or foods that make us obese.
Over drinking
Using addictive substances
Smoking etc

To protect the gene pool handed down to us by our Ancient ancestors, we must not mistreat the body.
This is (genuinely) one of the reasons I eat well and go to the gym. Its out of respect to my ancestors, and the dna they have given me.

I know it sounds weird, but its true. Your body is an inheritance from your ancestors.

Recent research has also shown that what we eat in this lifetime, affects (at least) the well being of our GRANDCHILDREN.

So if you care about the health and wellbeing of any grandchildren you may have, eat well, and they will benefit DIRECTLY

I quote
Biology stands on the brink of a shift in the understanding of inheritance. The discovery of epigenetics – hidden influences upon the genes – could affect every aspect of our lives.

At the heart of this new field is a simple but contentious idea – that genes have a 'memory'. That the lives of your grandparents – the air they breathed, the food they ate, even the things they saw – can directly affect you, decades later, despite your never experiencing these things yourself. And that what you do in your lifetime could in turn affect your grandchildren.

BBC Horizon The Ghost in Your Genes
See
http://www.bbc.co.uk/sn/tvradio/programmes/horizon/ghostgenes.shtml

Drink 3Litres of water a day in the Summer

And at least 2 Litres of water a day in the Winter.
And (something like) an extra half pint for every half hour of exercise you do per day.

Best time to drink is on an empty stomach in the morning.
I have 2 pints first thing, and have another 4 pints at my desk before 5pm so that when I go home I can eat dinner straight away.

Room temperature water is better than chilled water.

Do not drink when you are eating. It dilutes the gastric juices and slows digestion

Allow 20mins after drinking before you eat.
That's how long it takes for water to get out of the stomach and into the small intestine.

Allow 2 hours after eating before you drink
That's how long it takes for food to get out of the stomach and into the small intestine.

Don't wait till you feel thirsty before you drink water
By the time you feel thirsty, the body is already dehydrated.

When your body is dehydrated your blood becomes more 'sticky' and doesn't move nearly so well through the veins.
That's why they always say drink lots of water on flights so that you don't end up getting thrombosis.

You can tell if you are dehydrated because your pee will not be pale.
Pale pee is good and means your body has enough water.

Its the best and cheapest moisturizer!

Tea, coffee, etc doesn't count. It has to be water.
Apparently, (in theory) even if you drink 3 gallons of tea, the caffiene in the tea will mean that you end up peeing MORE than three gallons. Basically, the more caffiene-y drinks you have, the less water your body has.

Please use common sense when doing these things!, so if your doctor tells you you are allergic to water or something, please ignore this!

It's just that I've found this very helpful. I only started it a year ago or something, but it COMPLETLY changed my eating patterns, energy levels, and caffeine addiction. Thank God!

Do you want to be right, or do you want to be happy?

There is an exception to EVERY Rule. Including this one..

Or as I like to say
NOTHING is true ALL of the time

There is NO view that holds true under ALL circumstances.

The Christians have a different way of saying it:
'There is a time and a place for EVERYTHING'

Yep. EVERYTHING.
You name it.
The whole nine yards.
All the things you think are 'good'
And All the things you think are 'bad'

In God's world, there is a place for the WHOLE lot.
There are no bouncers on the door, so to speak.
Anything (!!) no matter how weird has a rightful and ethical place in God's scheme of things.
IN THE RIGHT CONTEXT.
Its a bit scary huh?
So much for our cozy ideas of what we think is 'right 'or 'wrong'.
If only we knew!

This is for the stubborn, opinionated and generalizing people out there.
(And yes I have plenty of the stubborn gene going on as well you will be glad to know!)

For me, EVERYTHING is on a case by case basis

Its not like I just 'figured life out' and sit around (metaphorically) for the rest of my life never using my brain.

I have to evaluate EVERY situation on its own merits.
There ARE NO pre prescribed 'answers' to life.

This is why generalizations are just a way of being mentally lazy.

Perceptions and ideas mask the true nature of reality.
They are a buffer to a DIRECT experience of what is in front of us.

Be Guided by RESULTS not Reasoning

Do you want to be right, or do you want to be happy?

I call it Results-Led as opposed to Ideas-Led

An idea may be compelling, but unless it patently WORKS, don't 'buy' it.
Reasoing, Rhetoric, Ideas, Arguments, they're all the same.

Follow what WORKS, and not much else.

Do more of what works
Do less of what doesn't

Make decisions and steer your life based on results.
Be guided by what makes you happy and makes your life better. No matter what it is.

Don't get caught up in the 'idea' of the thing.
Concentrate on how the action is affecting your life.

If your life is getting better, easier, happier, then it MUST be a GOOD thing.
If your life is getting worse, harder, more miserable, then it MUST be a BAD thing.

This does NOT count for things like going to the gym.
Going to the gym is an effort, but feels great after we do it.
Delayed gratification etc.

Will I end up being a Nun?

Or a missionary in Africa?
Or someone who wears sandals and carries a tambourine?
Or someone who wears a lot of beige and is a tad..dull?
Or someone who sits at home on a Saturday night reading Spiritual Books?

...er.. not unless you reckon doing ANY OF THOSE THINGS would make you
happy, joyous, and free..

So basically.. no.
(Phew!)

Unless of course you REALLY LIKE that kind of thing.
Each to their own and all that..

Chapter 9. THE FAMILY AFTERWARD page 133
We are SURE
God wants us to be happy, joyous, and free.

Get off the Cross, we need the wood..

Being a Martyr is NOT Spiritual
Self Pity is NOT Spiritual

Why can we say that?

Chapter 9. THE FAMILY AFTERWARD
page 133
We are SURE
God wants us to be happy, joyous, and free.

Does being a martyr sound happy joyous and free? (for you)
Well then, it mustn't be God's Will! (for you)

First you get a pebble..

Then you get a Brick..
Then you get a Boulder

So keep scanning the horizon for trouble
and watch out for pebbles
..and the occasional brick on the back of the head
if you are planning on not getting crushed by any boulders in the near future.

Trust me.
if you don't take care of the pebbles
You will soon be dealing with bricks
and you may end up being violently eviscerated by a boulder.

And it won't be pretty.
So ALL my pebbles warrant my attention. As far as I am concerned.

Where are the 'pebbles' in your life?
At work?
With friends?
In AA?
With your family?
In your thinking?
In how you are feeling today?

The antidote to all 'pebbles' is (our old friend) Helpfulness.
Look for do-able opportunities for helpfulness.
Ones that do NOT compromise your integrity.
Ie. Being a martyr or a doormat is NOT an option.

YOU SNOOZE YOU LOSE

****This is probably one of my ALL TIME FAVORITE sayings****

PAY ATTENTION! PLEASE!
Most of recovery is about PAYING ATTENTION
And most of enlightenment is about being self aware, which comes from guess what?
Paying attention!!

The greatest gift you can give yourself
Is to pay attention
Every day
For the rest of your life

And trust me, you snooze, you REALLY do LOSE
You get it in the neck. BIG TIME.
You CANNOT afford to take your eye off the ball, in ANY area of your life.

Any mother who has had to take care of a toddler will know about this principle
Because small children can so easily do something that could kill them in 30 seconds or less.
That's why it's so mentally exhausting looking after small children.
Ideally we should be trying to pay attention to OUR lives as much as a mother is FORCED to pay attention to a toddler.

As Gentle as Doves, but as Wise as Serpents

This was Jesus's advice to his Disciples when they went out to carry 'their message'.
It's VERY smart advice in my opinion!

YOU SNOOZE YOU LOSE

Please do NOT leave your brains at the door when it comes to being Spiritual!!

This is NOT about some fluffy, spaced-out, cloud cuckoo land where we all hold hands and 'share' (Pass the bucket!)

Being GULLIBLE is NOT Spiritual
TRUSTING BLINDLY AND UNTHINKINGLY is NOT Spiritual
NOT USING YOUR BRAIN is NOT Spiritual

Please use your Brain!!
NOT in the service of your various neuroses!
But in the service or understanding, awareness, and wisdom.

Chapter 9. THE FAMILY AFTERWARD
page 130
We have come to believe
He would like us to keep our heads in the clouds with Him,
but that our feet ought to be FIRMLY PLANTED ON EARTH.

Chapter 9. THE FAMILY AFTERWARD
page 130
We have found nothing incompatible
between a powerful spiritual experience
and a life of SANE AND HAPPY USEFULNESS.

NEVER accept what your head tells you on face value

Hahaa no pun intended!
Because it may be utter KAK!

Generally I would say don't take ANYTHING on face value, as I think that's just being gullible and foolish.

But in particular, with alcoholics, who have very often very distorted and negative views of the world, I always say
DO NOT JUST LISTEN TO WHAT IT TELLS YOU PASSIVELY!!

Be actively engaged in the process of thought
Talk back to it if needs be. Out loud if you like. (Not recommended when you are in sainsburys!)

Frinstance
Next time your head tells you what a useless, fat, lazy good for nothing you are..
Why not say something like
Thank you for sharing, its always nice to hear another point of view, but I have to admit that I really don't agree with what you're saying. Now EFF OFF!!

Hahahaa
Or whatever you like really.

Basically don't just sit there 'listening' to the 'washing machine' type rambling your head comes out with

Or. Plan B
Do something from the just for today card.
Or one of the 6 things

Basically either challenge it or roadblock it by engaging in another mental activity.
The choice is yours

For Stubborn Beliefs..

Imagine the opposite is true for five minutes.
REALLY true.
Difficult isn't it?
It's amazing how 'right' we think we are, isn't it?

If suspending your belief for five minutes is too hard
try it for one minute
or thirty seconds

This is an AMAZING insight into the STUBBORN-NESS of our beliefs!
Anything highly infexible is DEEPLY SUSPECT in my opinion.

Reassure yourself that you will return to your 'old idea; after 5mins so its 'ok'.
(It's just a trick to fool your brain)

Then try it for another five.

You (in the course if time) be AMAZED at how WRONG you have been about many things.

Often those 'opposites' turn out to be true after all!
Who'd have thought eh?

Another way of countering negative beliefs is to 'act as if'
That's the same sort of thing, and works just as well

Treat ALL Perception as HIGHLY SUSPECT

Chapter 5, How it Works, page 58
Some of us have tried to hold on to our old ideas
and the result was NIL
until we let go ABSOLUTELY.

Confidence is the feeling you sometimes have before you fully understand the situation.

Alcoholics are very opinionated and often wrong, but never in doubt.

Chapter 11, A Vision for You, page 164
We realize we know only a little.

'Doubt may be an uncomfortable state of mind but certainty is ridiculous.' ~Voltaire

'There are no facts, only interpretations.' ~Friedrich Nietzsche

'Are you sure?' ~Thich Nhat Hanh

Learn to distrust even the MOST compelling
reactive or negative habitual reactions


I now know that even when I have a compelling belief
that something is inherently 'wrong',
that if it is one of the aspects of life I have great difficulty in coming to terms with or accepting,
that my interpretation is highly likely to be BS.

This is easy to say in theory but very difficult to practice
when all my buttons are pushed and I experience internally
what can only be described as some sort of rage.

Sometimes it's like someone threw a grenade in my head or something!

Thank god for 'restraint of tongue and pen'.
Otherwise I would dig myself a bigger hole.

I need to go to any lengths to bite my tongue, reserve my judgement
and keep my (temporarily vitriolic) opinion to myself.

Therefore not 'act out.'
The mood ALWAYS passes
and I see it much more impartially once I've cooled down.

Ego Feeding is BAD

Ego Puncturing is GOOD

NOT a 'Financial Awakening'

Chapter 9. THE FAMILY AFTERWARD
page 127
For us, material well-being ALWAYS followed spiritual progress;
it NEVER preceded.

That goes for 'sexual awkenings', 'relationship awakenings' and every other kind of awakening
EXCEPT a SPIRITUAL awakening

!!

Fit Spiritual Condition. Maintain it or else!

Chapter 6. INTO ACTION page 85
What we really have is a DAILY REPRIEVE
contingent on the MAINTENENCE of our SPIRITUAL CONDITION.

Chapter 1. BILL'S STORY page 15
if he failed to perfect and enlarge his spiritual life
through work and self-sacrifice for others,
he could NOT survive the CERTAIN trials and low spots ahead.

Chapter 6. INTO ACTION page 85
That is how we react so long as we keep in FIT SPIRITUAL CONDITION.

Chapter 7. WORKING WITH OTHERS page 100
Assuming we are SPIRITUALLY FIT,
we can do all sorts of things alcoholics are not supposed to do.

Chapter 3. MORE ABOUT ALCOHOLISM page 35
All went well for a time,
but he failed to enlarge his spiritual life.

Chapter 6. INTO ACTION page 85
It is easy to let up on the spiritual program of action
and rest on our laurels.

Chapter 5. HOW IT WORKS page 60
We are willing to grow along spiritual lines.

Chapter 5. HOW IT WORKS page 66
But with the alcoholic,
whose hope is the MAINTENENCE and growth of a spiritual experience,
this business of resentment is infinitely grave.

Chapter 4. WE AGNOSTICS
page 44
To be doomed to an alcoholic death
or to live on a spiritual basis
are not always easy alternatives to face.

Chapter 4. WE AGNOSTICS page 44
But after a while
we had to face the fact
that we must find a spiritual basis of life -- or else.

Chapter 2. THERE IS A SOLUTION page 25
there was nothing left for us
but to pick up the simple kit of spiritual tools laid at our feet.

Chapter 2. THERE IS A SOLUTION page 25
We were in a position where life was becoming impossible,
and if we had passed into the region
from which there is no return through human aid,
we had but two alternatives:
One was to go on to the bitter end,
blotting out the consciousness of our intolerable situation as best we could;
and the other, to accept spiritual help.

Ways to Fail at Sobriety

p58
Those who do not recover
are people who cannot or will not
COMPLETELY give themselves to THIS simple program

p70
If we are not sorry,
and our conduct continues to harm others,
WE ARE QUITE SURE TO DRINK.

p72
If we skip this vital step, we may not overcome drinking.

p72
Time after time newcomers have tried to keep to themselves certain facts about their lives.
Trying to avoid this humbling experience,
they have turned to easier methods.
Almost invariably THEY GOT DRUNK.
Having persevered with the rest of the program, they wondered why they fell.
We think the reason is that they never completed their housecleaning.
They took inventory all right, but hung on to some of the worst items in stock.
They only THOUGHT they had lost their egoism and fear;
they only THOUGHT they had humbled themselves.
But they had not learned enough of humility, fearlessness and honesty,
in the sense we find it necessary,
until they told someone else ALL their life story.

p72
We MUST be ENTIRELY honest with somebody
if we expect to live long or happily in this world.

p73
Resentment is the "number one" offender.
It DESTROYS more alcoholics than anything else.
From it stem ALL forms of spiritual disease

p64
If we were to live, we HAD to be free of anger.
The grouch and the brainstorm were not for us.
They may be the dubious luxury of normal men,
but for alcoholics these things are poison.

p66
this business of resentment is infinitely grave.
We found that it is fatal.
For when harboring such feeling
we shut ourselves off from the sunlight of the Spirit.
The insanity of alcohol returns
and we drink again.
And with us, to drink is to die.

p66
Faith without works is dead

Chapter 5. HOW IT WORKS page 64
Though our decision was vital and crucial step,
IT COULD HAVE LITTLE PERMANENT EFFECT
unless AT ONCE followed by

Step Five. Tell ALL, or Drink

P72
Time after time newcomers have tried to keep to themselves
certain facts about their lives.
Trying to avoid this humbling experience,
they have turned to easier methods.

Almost invariably they got drunk.

Having persevered with the rest of the program,
they wondered why they fell.
We think the reason is that they never completed their housecleaning.
They took inventory all right,
but hung on to some of the worst items in stock.
They only thought they had lost their egoism and fear;
they only thought they had humbled themselves.
But they had not learned enough of humility, fearlessness and honesty,
in the sense we find it necessary,
until they told someone else ALL their life story.

p72
We must be entirely honest with somebody
if we expect to live long or happily in this world.

Don't be a 'Mental Loafer'

Chapter 6. INTO ACTION page 86
Under these conditions
we can employ our mental faculties with assurance,
for after all
God gave us brains to USE.

Chapter 6. INTO ACTION page 85
"How can I best serve Thee,
Thy will (not mine) be done."
These are THOUGHTS which must go with us CONSTANTLY.
We can exercise our WILL POWER along this line all we wish.
It is the proper use of the will.

So Please
use your Brain
and employ your will power in the service of doing the suggetsions.

Thinking is fine if you direct it along these lines.

Powerlessness is NOT Passivity or Negligence

You STILL have to go to ANY LENGTHS

Wimps and Doormats are NOT Spiritual

Chapter 6. INTO ACTION page 83
As God's people
we stand on our feet;
we don't crawl before ANYONE.

Step Nine Promises

Chapter 6. INTO ACTION page 84
For by this time sanity will have returned.

Chapter 6. INTO ACTION page 83
If we are painstaking about this phase of our development,
we will be AMAZED before we are half way through.
We are going to know a new freedom
and a new happiness.
We will not regret the past
nor wish to shut the door on it.
We will comprehend the word serenity
and we will KNOW peace.
No matter how far down the scale we have gone,
we will see how our experience can benefit others.
That feeling of uselessness
and self-pity will DISAPPEAR
We will lose interest in selfish things
and gain interest in our fellows.
Self-seeking will slip away.
Our WHOLE attitude and outlook upon life will change.
Fear of people and of economic insecurity will leave us.
We will intuitively know how to handle situations
which used to baffle us.
We will suddenly realize
that God is doing for us
what we could not do for ourselves.

Are these extravagant promises?
We think not.
They are being fulfilled among us,
sometimes quickly,
sometimes slowly.
They will ALWAYS materialize
IF we work for them.

Chapter 6. INTO ACTION page 84
We have entered the world of the Spirit.

Chapter 6. INTO ACTION page 85
We will seldom be interested in liquor.
If tempted, we recoil from it as from a hot flame.
We react sanely and normally,
and we will find that this has happened automatically.
We will see that our new attitude toward liquor has been given us
without any thought or effort on our part. It just comes!
That is the miracle of it.
We are not fighting it, neither are we avoiding temptation.
We feel as though we had been placed in a position of neutrality safe and protected.
We have not even sworn off.
Instead, the problem has been removed.
It does not exist for us.
We are neither cocky nor are we afraid.
That is our experience.
That is how we react so long as we keep in FIT SPIRITUAL CONDITION.

Step Five Promises

Chapter 6. INTO ACTION page 76
Once we have taken this step, withholding nothing,
we are delighted.
We can look the world in the eye.
We can be alone at perfect peace and ease.
Our fears fall from us.
We begin to feel the nearness of our Creator.
We may have had certain spiritual beliefs,
but now we begin to have a spiritual experience.
The feeling that the drink problem has disappeared will often come strongly.
We feel we are on the Broad Highway,
walking hand in hand with the Spirit of the Universe.

Step Three Promises

Chapter 5. HOW IT WORKS page 63
When we sincerely took such a position,
all sorts of remarkable things followed.
We had a new Employer.
Being all powerful,
He provided what we needed,
if we kept close to Him and performed His work well.
Established on such a footing
we became less and less interested in ourselves,
our own little plans and designs.
More and more we became interested in seeing what we could contribute to life.
As we felt new power flow in,
as we enjoyed peace of mind,
as we discovered we could face life successfully,
as we became conscious of His presence,
we began to lose our fear of today, tomorrow or the hereafter.
We were reborn.

This was only a beginning,
though if honestly and humbly made,
an effect, sometimes a very great one,
was felt at once.

Beginnings of a spiritual experience

Chapter 6. INTO ACTION page 75
We may have had certain spiritual beliefs,
but now we begin to have a spiritual experience.

Chapter 11. A VISION FOR YOU page 158
He had begun to have a spiritual experience.

God-consciousness

Chapter 6. INTO ACTION page 84
We have entered the world of the Spirit.

Chapter 6. INTO ACTION page 76
We feel we are on the Broad Highway,
walking hand in hand with the Spirit of the Universe

Chapter 6. INTO ACTION page 75
We begin to feel the nearness of our Creator.

Chapter 4. WE AGNOSTICS
page 55
the consciousness of your belief
is SURE to come to you.

Chapter 6. INTO ACTION page 85
To some extent we have become God-conscious.

Chapter 9. THE FAMILY AFTERWARD page 130
This dream world has been replaced by a great sense of purpose,
accompanied by a growing consciousness
of the power of God in our lives.

Chapter 4. WE AGNOSTICS
page 56
For the first time,
he lived in conscious companionship
with his Creator.

Chapter 4. WE AGNOSTICS
page 47
At the start, this was all we needed to commence spiritual growth,
to effect our first conscious relation with God
as we understood Him.

Chapter 5. HOW IT WORKS page 63
As we felt new power flow in,
as we enjoyed peace of mind,
as we discovered we could face life successfully,
as we became conscious of His presence,
we began to lose our fear of today, tomorrow or the hereafter.

Chapter 5. HOW IT WORKS
page 59
Sought through prayer and meditation
to improve our conscious contact with God
as we understood Him ,
praying only for knowledge of His will for us
and the power to carry that out.

Chapter 6. INTO ACTION page 87
Being still inexperienced
and having just made conscious contact with God,
it is not probable that we are going to be inspired at all times.

Chapter 4. WE AGNOSTICS page 51
When many hundreds of people are able to say
that the consciousness of the Presence of God
is today the most important fact of their lives,
they present a powerful reason why one should have faith.

A vital 'Sixth Sense'

Chapter 6. INTO ACTION page 85
We have begun to develop this vital sixth sense.

Chapter 1. BILL'S STORY page 13
Common sense would thus become uncommon sense.

Chapter 6. INTO ACTION page 83
We will intuitively know how to handle situations
which used to baffle us.

Chapter 6. INTO ACTION page 84
We have entered the world of the Spirit.

Chapter 1. BILL'S STORY page 13
I was to test my thinking
by the new God-consciousness within.

Chapter 6. INTO ACTION page 87
Being still inexperienced
and having just made conscious contact with God,
it is not probable that we are going to be inspired at all times.

Higher Powered

Chapter 6. INTO ACTION page 85
If we have carefully followed directions,
we have begun to sense the flow of His Spirit into us.

Chapter 4. WE AGNOSTICS page 46
As soon as we admitted the possible existence
of a Creative Intelligence,
a Spirit of the Universe underlying the totality of things,
we began to be possessed of a new sense of power and direction,

Chapter 2. THERE IS A SOLUTION page 25
The central fact of our lives today
is the absolute CERTAINTY
that our Creator has entered into our hearts
and lives in a way which is indeed miraculous.

Chapter 6. INTO ACTION page 85
Much has already been said
about receiving strength, inspiration, and direction
from Him who has all knowledge and power.

Chapter 4. WE AGNOSTICS
page 50
This Power
has in each case accomplished the miraculous,
the humanly impossible.

Chapter 5. HOW IT WORKS page 63
This was only a beginning,
though if honestly and humbly made,
an effect,
sometimes a VERY great one,
was felt AT ONCE.

Chapter 5. HOW IT WORKS page 63
As we felt new power flow in,
as we enjoyed peace of mind,
as we discovered we could face life successfully,
as we became conscious of His presence,
we began to lose our fear of today, tomorrow or the hereafter.

Chapter 6. INTO ACTION page 83
We will suddenly realize
that God is doing for us
what we could not do for ourselves.

Chapter 1. BILL'S STORY page 13
My friend promised when these things were done
I WOULD enter upon a new relationship with my Creator;

Chapter 4. WE AGNOSTICS
page 55
For faith in a Power greater than ourselves,
and miraculous demonstrations of that power in human lives,
are facts as old as man himself.

Step 3 takes 5mins and its message is TRUST

SOBER NOT SOMBER. Is Recovery supposed to be fun?

Chapter 1. BILL'S STORY page 16
There is, however, a VAST amount of FUN about it all.

Chapter 9. THE FAMILY AFTERWARD page 132
We aren't a glum lot.

Chapter 9. THE FAMILY AFTERWARD page 132
If newcomers could see no joy or fun in our existence, they wouldn't want it.

Chapter 9. THE FAMILY AFTERWARD page 132
We think cheerfulness and laughter make for usefulness.

Chapter 2. THERE IS A SOLUTION page 17
There exists among us a fellowship, a friendliness, and an understanding
which is indescribably wonderful

Chapter 9. THE FAMILY AFTERWARD page 132
Everybody know that those in bad health,
and those who seldom play,
do not laugh much.

The Maintenence Steps. 10, 11 and 12

You are Restored to Sanity

(Having just completed Step 9)
Chapter 6. INTO ACTION page 84
For by this time sanity will have returned.

Step 2 Cheers you up. It's message is HOPE

Steps 3, 5, 6, 7 and 9 can be very quick and easy

Step 1 and 4 are the most labour intensive

Step 1 is a 'downer'. This is a GOOD thing!

After the Last 2hr Step 5 session. -Reflection

Returning home we find a place where we can be quiet for an hour,
carefully reviewing what we have done.
We thank God from the bottom of our heart that we know Him better.
Taking this book down from our shelf we turn to the page which contains the twelve steps.
Carefully reading the first five proposals
we ask if we have omitted anything,
for we are building an arch through which we shall walk a free man at last.
Is our work solid so far?
Are the stones properly in place?
Have we skimped on the cement put into the foundation?
Have we tried to make mortar without sand?

The Definition of Thorough

1 Exhaustively complete: a thorough search.
2 Painstakingly accurate or careful: thorough research.
3 Absolute; utter: a thorough pleasure.

So, it looks like the first 100 members are telling you
in NO uncertain terms
that in order for this programme to work
ie meaning 'you have recovered'
as opposed to being what they call 'dry' or 'like a boy whistling in the dark'

You need to be
Exhaustively complete
Painstakingly accurate
and Absolute
in your execution of the instructions they have so kindly made available to you.

And if you are not
Exhaustively complete
Painstakingly accurate
and Absolute
in your execution of the instructions

Well then, they do NOT guarantee that you will recover.
Dry yes. Recovered? Its not a sure thing as far as they are concerned.

So you pays your money and you makes your choice.
What's it to be?
Thorough, and therefore pretty much a sure thing?
Permanent sobriety and all the cool stuff in the promises?

Or not thorough, and possibly not Permanent sobriety and all the cool stuff in the promises?

The choice is yours.
Its VERY clear what the first 100 members think we should do.

Chapter 5. HOW IT WORKS
page 58
With ALL the earnestness at our command,
we BEG of you
to be fearless and THOROUGH
from the very start.

Setting out to get drunk. -Therefore I am in control of my drinking?

Chapter 3. MORE ABOUT ALCOHOLISM page 37
We now see that when we began to drink deliberately, instead or casually,
there was little serious or effective thought
during the period of premeditation
of what the terrific consequences might be.

Chapter 3. MORE ABOUT ALCOHOLISM page 37
But even in this type of beginning
we are obliged to admit
that our justification for a spree
was insanely insufficient
in the light of what always happened.

So.. no.

The importance of being THOROUGH

Chapter 5. HOW IT WORKS
page 58
Rarely have we seen a person fail
who has THOROUGHLY followed our path.

Chapter 5. HOW IT WORKS
page 58
With ALL the earnestness at our command,
we BEG of you
to be fearless and THOROUGH
from the very start.

The Boy Whose Skin Fell Off

Is a really great Channel 4 Documentary.

Its about a guy called Jonny Kennedy who died in 2003 aged 36.
He had a terrible genetic condition called Dystrophic Epidermolysis Bullosa

In my opinion he was a special person. He had incredible strength of character, and calmly stated that the only reason for being alive is to 'be helpful'. And had nothing but compassion for people who were unable to see that. Pretty radiant really.

Amazing programme if you ever get a chance to see it.

Step Two. - the Minimum Requirement

We needed to ask ourselves but ONE short question.
"Do I now believe,
or am I even willing to believe,
that there is a Power greater than myself?"

Chapter 1. BILL'S STORY page 12
Nothing more was required of me to make my beginning.

Tradition 2. It HAS to be a LOVING Power. Not JUGMENTAL or PUNISHING.
A Constructive not a Destructive force.

Look up the word POWER in the dictionary.
The word is POWER not God. Don't get them confused.
Mull over the word 'Power' and see what images come to mind..
Personally I like the visualization of 'Power' in the cinema. Like in the X men, star wars or star trek type things. They often try to dramatize 'Power' at some point in the storyline. This is a useful tool to help us meditate on what the word 'Power' means to us.

As soon as a man can say
that he does believe,
or is willing to believe,
we emphatically assure him that he is on his way.

It has been repeatedly proven among us
that upon this simple cornerstone
a wonderfully effective spiritual structure can be built.

Chapter 4. WE AGNOSTICS page 47
At the start, this was all we needed to commence spiritual growth,
to effect our first conscious relation
with God as we understood Him.

Chapter 4. WE AGNOSTICS
page 55
the consciousness of your belief is sure to come to you.

Here are some ideas for a concept of a Power Greater than Yourself

The Power of AA as a whole
The collective power of the group.
The Power that makes the Earth turn
Good Orderly Direction
Group Of Drunks
The sense of magnitude you get when you look at the stars at night.
The Universe..
Gravity

The more you think about it, the more you realize that everybody has a concept of a power greater than themselves.
Think what life would be like if the world was full of people that thought they were the most powerful entity in the universe. (!) weird huh?

The 'Alcoholic Mind' Do you still have one?

(In regard to the ability to be around alcohol after Step 9)
Chapter 7. WORKING WITH OTHERS page 101
We meet these conditions every day.
An alcoholic who cannot meet them, still has an ALCOHOLIC MIND;
there is something the matter with his spiritual status.

Chapter 3. MORE ABOUT ALCOHOLISM page 41
I now remembered what my alcoholic friends had told me,
how they prophesied that if I had an ALCOHOLIC MIND,
the time and place would come -- I would drink again.

Chapter 2. THERE IS A SOLUTION page 23
Therefore, the main problem of the alcoholic centers in his mind, rather than in his body.

Chapter 3. MORE ABOUT ALCOHOLISM page 42
I knew from that moment that I had an ALCOHOLIC MIND.
I saw that will power and self-knowledge would not help
in those strange mental blank spots.

Chapter 2. THERE IS A SOLUTION page 24
The almost certain consequences that follow taking even a glass of beer
do not crowd into the (alcoholic) MIND to deter us.

Dry but not Recovered? COMPLETELY give yourself..

Chapter 5. HOW IT WORKS page 58
Those who do not recover
are people who cannot or will not
COMPLETELY give themselves
to THIS simple program,

usually men and women
who are constitutionally incapable of being honest with themselves.

Notice it doesn't say, those who DRINK,
It just says 'Those who do NOT RECOVER

Meaning, You may stay sober but NEVER recover from alcoholism.

I love the fact that this statement completely side steps the whole issue of drinking/ not drinking and instead focuses entirely on whether someone had RECOVERED or not. Which is far more telling in my opinion.

So this statement implies that there are many people who simply DO NOT RECOVER despite not drinking and going along with the recovery programme to some extent. Perhaps in a buffet-style. Taking the bits they like and leaving out other bits.

I don't know about you but I see a LOT of people who are not experiencing the description of recovery (or the promises as I like to call them) but who are not drinking and are doing bits of the programme. Perhaps just going to meetings and relating their day to day concerns, but not getting through the steps or spending time with newcomers 'giving it away to keep it'.

Obviously unity and tolerance are a priority, so I practice Live and let Live when I encounter these types, but when given the opportunity I try to explain why thoroughness is SUCH an important criteria in MY recovery, and what is potentially at stake if I do not do that.

As far as I am concerned, I risk NEVER RECOVERING if I 'leave bits out' of the programme.
I HAVE to do the WHOLE NINE YARDS if I expect to get well.

If I leave things out, I do so at my own peril.
That's why I'm a real stickler for thoroughness. In myself and the people I sponsor. Like the first 100 members I think its a VERY important aspect of recovery. That's why they mention it so categorically in how it works. In my opinion.

Its also why I prefer not to sponsor people who I instinctively feel are just going through the motions because they want to get to step nine and start dating, (or whatever).
I don't expect 'going through the motions' to work any more than the first 100 members did. Its superficial and partial, and therefore pretty much guarantees that they will not recover.
As taking people through the steps actually requires quite a lot of hard work, and time and energy, I am not willing to commit time and energy to a formula that is designed NOT to deliver recovery. The best thing to do with someone like this is to explain as best I can that I do not think it is working and why, and that they ought to find someone else they either respond to better, or who demands less of themselves and has therefore probably not recovered (to the extent that I would expect to) either. There are plenty of people like this in AA to choose from, so finding a new sponsor along those lines is never a problem. They are much better suited to a sponsor with a similar mindset to their own. Attraction not Promotion and all that. After all, it's not for people that NEED it, its for people that WANT it.

Letter from your Disease

Hello,

Just in case you forgot me, I am your disease.  I hate meetings, I hate higher powers, I hate anyone who has and works a program. To all who come in contact with me, I wish you suffering and I wish you death.

Allow me to tell you about myself.  I am the disease of addiction.  I am cunning, baffling and powerful.  I have killed millions.  I have ruined lives of millions more and I am pleased.  I love to catch you by surprise.  I love pretending that I am your friend and lover.  I have given you comfort, haven't I?  Wasn't I there when you were lonely?  When you wanted to die, didn't you call on me and didn't I answer?  I was there.  I love to make you hurt, I love to make you cry; better yet, I love to make you so numb that you can neither hurt nor cry.  I love to help you give up and feel hopeless.  When you can't feel anything at all, that is my true gratification.  And all that I ask from you is long term suffering and lonely despair.

I've been there for you always.  When things were going right in your life, you invited me in.  You said you didn't deserve these good things, and I was the only one who agreed with you.  Together, we were able to destroy everything good in your life.  When things went wrong, I was there to agree with you about how unfair life is and how blameless you are for anything that happens to you.  I was the only one who would crawl down into the slimy paralysis of self-pity and wallow around with you there.

People don't take me seriously, and while this wounds my pride, I don't really mind because it so strongly serves my purpose.  People take strokes seriously; heart attacks, diabetes, AIDS--these they take seriously.  Fools.  Without my help those illnesses would not even be possible for many people.  I am such a hated disease and yet I do not come uninvited.  You choose whether or not to have me active in your life.  Doesn't that prove how powerful and cunning I am?  So many choose me over reality and hope even while they say they hate me.

But more that you hate me, I hate all of you who have embraced recovery.  Your refusal to invite me in your program, your meetings, your higher power.  All of these things weaken and disgust me, and I can't function in the manner I am accustomed to.  Now I must lie here quietly, waiting. Oh, you don't see me much anymore, but I am here, and I have all the time in the world to wait for you.  When you only exist, I may live.  When you live, I may only exist.  But I am here, and until we meet again--if we meet again--I wish you misery and death, just as I always have done and always will do

Most sincerely,
Your Disease

from http://www.yerbuddybd.com/04b-recovery.htm

Inferior? Try Daily 'Acknowledgements'

It consists of writing down at least 6 things a day
of stuff you have done in the last 24 hours that you have done.
Basically you are acknowleging the efforts and attempts to have made,
regardless of the outcome. Its not about 'success' its about trying.
Meaning..
“While one person hesitates because he feels inferior, another is busy making mistakes and becoming superior.”
Henry C. Link quote

So it might go like this:
Today I acknowledge that I spent an hour on the phone to my old dad helping him find a new washing machine.
Today I acknowledge that I am going to the gym
Today I acknowledge that I tried to explain how I deal with my recurring tendencies toward inferiority in sobriety using the steps and the maintenance tools after completing the first 9.
Today I acknowledge that I spoke to my sponsees this morning.
Today I acknowledge that my intention is to eat only raw fruit and veg today

Etc etc
Just thought that example might prove useful.
Obviously the programme comes first, but I have been very pleased with the affect that this method has in restoring my faith in myself and my abilities. And as a result, I recommend this method to people with this tendency, but only after they have completed step 1 to 9. But that's only because I want them to see how powerful the steps are by themselves. (the way I was shown how to do them anyway).

'Strange mental blank spots'. What are they?

Chapter 3. MORE ABOUT ALCOHOLISM page 42
I saw that will power and self-knowledge would not help
in those strange mental blank spots.

Chapter 3. MORE ABOUT ALCOHOLISM p43
Once more: The alcoholic AT CERTAIN TIMES
has NO effective mental defense against the first drink.

Notice it just says ‘at certain times’. NOT all the time.
-Or just when we experience a very obvious craving for a drink.

What does ‘at certain times’ mean? All day? One hour in the evening?

Chapter 2. THERE IS A SOLUTION p24
If these thoughts occur,
they are hazy and readily supplanted
with the old threadbare idea
that this time we shall handle ourselves like other people

What are the implications of this statement?
Can you rely on your thinking to keep you in check?
What is the difference between ‘no effective mental defense’ and a perceived craving for a drink?

Chapter 3. MORE ABOUT ALCOHOLISM page 41
The thought came to mind
that it would be nice to have a couple of cocktails with dinner.
That was all. Nothing more.
This time I had not thought of the consequences at all.

Chapter 3. MORE ABOUT ALCOHOLISM p36
I had no intention of drinking.
I just thought I would get a sandwich.

Chapter 3. MORE ABOUT ALCOHOLISM p37
But there was always the curious mental phenomenon that
parallel with our sound reasoning
there inevitably ran some insanely trivial excuse for taking the first drink.
Our sound reasoning failed to hold us in check.

Chapter 3. MORE ABOUT ALCOHOLISM p37
we are obliged to admit that our justification for a spree
was insanely insufficient in the light of what always happened.
there was little serious or effective thought
during the period of premeditation
of what the terrific consequences might be.

Chapter 3. MORE ABOUT ALCOHOLISM page 40
I felt I had every right to be self-confident,
that it would be only a matter of exercising my will power
and keeping on guard.

Chapter 3. MORE ABOUT ALCOHOLISM page 41
Not only had I been off guard,
I had made no fight whatever against the first drink.

Are you willing to go to any lengths?

The big book tells us we are NOTready to do the steps until we are ready to go to ‘any lengths’
p58
If you have decided
you want what we have
and are willing to go to ANY LENGTH to get it
-- THEN you are ready

Ie NOT before

Chapter 6. INTO ACTION
page 76
Remember it was agreed at the beginning
we would go to ANY LENGTHS for victory over alcohol.

Only Lightweights are Perfectionists

Chapter 5. HOW IT WORKS page 60
We are not saints.
The point is, that we are willing to grow along spiritual lines.
The principles we have set down are guides to progress.

Chapter 5. HOW IT WORKS page 60
We claim spiritual progress rather than spiritual perfection

Perfectionists have a LOUSY tolerance for error.
Their REAL problem is one of intolerance of human fallibility.

The 'NInja's' are out there, making mistakes and getting better day by day,
regardless of the errors they make along the way.

'Just do your lousy best' as a cool old timer used to say.

If you continue to be perfectionistic,
despite being aware of the instruction given on page 60
then you are doing the OPPOSITE of what the big book is instructing you to do.

“While one person hesitates because he feels inferior,
another is busy making mistakes and becoming superior.”
Henry C. Link quote

Being a Control freak is NOT Spiritual

Self Centerdness and the 'actor trying to run the show'

Chapter 5. HOW IT WORKS page 60
Each person is like an actor who wants to run the whole show;
is forever trying to arrange the lights,
the ballet,
the scenery
and the rest of the players
in HIS OWN WAY.
If his arrangements would only stay put,
if only people would do as he wished,
the show would be great. Everybody, including himself, would be pleased.
Life would be wonderful.

In trying to make these arrangements
our actor may sometimes be quite virtuous.
He may be kind, considerate, patient, generous; even modest and self-sacrificing.
On the other hand, he may be mean, egotistical, selfish and dishonest.
But, as with most humans,
he is more likely to have varied traits.

What usually happens?
The show doesn't come off very well.
He begins to think life doesn't treat him right.
He decides to exert himself more.
He becomes, on the next occasion,
still more demanding or gracious, as the case may be.
STILL THE PLAY DOES NOT SUIT HIM.

Admitting he may be somewhat at fault,
he is SURE that other people are more to blame.
He becomes angry, indignant, self-pitying.

What is his basic trouble?
Is he not really a self-seeker even when trying to be kind?

Is he not a victim of the DELUSION
that he can wrest satisfaction and happiness out of this world
if he only manages well?

Is it not evident to all the rest of the players
that these are the things he wants?

And do not his actions make each of them wish to retaliate,
snatching all they can get out of the show?

Is he not, even in his best moments,
a producer of confusion rather than harmony?


As a very cool old timer used to say...
'It was very simple. when i didn't get MY WAY, I copped a resentment'

Therefore:
Self Centredness (the desire to have things OUR WAY)
is a MASSIVE character defect
and plays a VERY significant part in forming our Resentments.

Identifiying the God 'Instructions' in the Big Book

Chapter 1. BILL'S STORY page 14
I MUST turn in ALL things
to the Father of Light
who presides over us all.

Chapter 4. WE AGNOSTICS page 47
At the start, this was all we needed to commence spiritual growth,
to effect our first conscious relation
with God as we understood Him.

Chapter 6. INTO ACTION page 85
Every day is a day when
we MUST carry the vision of God's will
into ALL of our activities

Chapter 11. A VISION FOR YOU page 164
God will determine that,
so you MUST remember
that your REAL reliance is always upon Him

Why does Religion not keep people sober?

Chapter 2. THERE IS A SOLUTION page 27
This hope, however, was destroyed by
the doctor's telling him
that while his religious convictions were very good,
in his case they did NOT spell
the necessary VITAL SPIRITUAL EXPERIENCE.

So you see, according to the first 100 members
The thing that keeps them sober, is NOT religion,
It IS the Spiritual awakening 'as a result of doing the steps'.

So staying sober, and recovering are dependent upon getting a 'spiritual awakening 'as a result of doing the steps'.
NOT upon being 'religious'.

Chapter 7. WORKING WITH OTHERS page 93
To be vital,
faith MUST be accompanied by
self sacrifice and unselfish, constructive action.

Here we see the first 100 members telling us another reason why religion (of itself) DOES NOT WORK.

In other words, even if you are Jesus's own little sunbeam, that unless you start ACTING like you are Jesus's little sunbeam, you are probably going to drink yourself to death.

This isn't confined to religious types. Have you heard the phrase 'Talk the talk versus walking the walk?'
AA is full of people who wax lyrical about the merits and wonders of AA, but whose primary purpose would not appear to be 'to stay sober and help other alcoholics achieve sobriety'.
Actions speak much louder than words, and you can tell what people REALLY think by watching what they do.

And I think we can safely say that the first 100 members must have thought this point was pretty important!!! Because they then see fit to REPEAT it 4 TIMES!!
So trust me, IT'S IMPORTANT. (!)

Chapter 1. BILL'S STORY page 14
Faith without works was dead, he said.

Chapter 1. BILL'S STORY page 15
Then faith would be dead indeed.

Chapter 6. INTO ACTION page 76
Faith without works is dead.

Chapter 6. INTO ACTION page 88
Faith without works is dead.

Yeah right! Do I REALLY have to be 'Spiritual'?

Chapter 6. INTO ACTION page 83
The spiritual life is NOT a theory. We HAVE to LIVE it.

Chapter 4. WE AGNOSTICS page 44
We MUST find a spiritual basis of life -- or else.

Chapter 6. INTO ACTION page 85
How can I best serve Thee?,
Thy will (not mine) be done."
These are thoughts which MUST go with us CONSTANTLY.

Chapter 3. MORE ABOUT ALCOHOLISM page 43
His defense MUST come from a Higher Power.

Chapter 1. BILL'S STORY page 14
I MUST turn in ALL things
to the Father of Light
who presides over us all.

Chapter 6. INTO ACTION page 85
Every day is a day when
we MUST carry the vision of God's will
into ALL of our activities

THE DOCTOR'S OPINION page xxvi
their ideals MUST be grounded
in a power greater than themselves,
if they are to re-create their lives.

Chapter 11. A VISION FOR YOU page 164
God will determine that,
so you MUST remember
that your REAL reliance is always upon Him

Heavy Handed 'Suggestions'

Chapter 5. HOW IT WORKS page 62
Above EVERYTHING,
We alcoholics MUST be rid of this selfishness.
We MUST, or it kill us!

Chapter 6. INTO ACTION page 74
We MUST be hard on ourself, but always considerate of others.

Chapter 6. INTO ACTION page 73
We MUST be entirely honest with somebody

Chapter 5. HOW IT WORKS page 66
these resentments MUST be mastered

Chapter 7. WORKING WITH OTHERS page 93
To be vital, faith MUST be accompanied
by self sacrifice and unselfish, constructive action.

Chapter 11. A VISION FOR YOU page 159
They knew they MUST help other alcoholics
if they would remain sober

THE DOCTOR'S OPINION page xxvi
The message which can interest and hold these alcoholic people
MUST have depth and weight.

Chapter 5. HOW IT WORKS page 69
We MUST be willing to make amends where we have done harm,
provided that we do not bring about still more harm in so doing.

ESSENTIAL REQUIREMENTS

Chapter 5. HOW IT WORKS page 60
The first requirement
is that we be CONVINCED that ANY life run on SELF-WILL
can hardly be a success.

Chapter 3. MORE ABOUT ALCOHOLISM page 33
If we are planning to stop drinking ,
there MUST be no reservation OF ANY KIND,
nor ANY lurking notion
that someday we will be immune to alcohol.

Chapter 3. MORE ABOUT ALCOHOLISM page 30
We learned that we HAD to fully concede to our innermost selves that we were alcoholics.
This is the first step in recovery.

Is being DIS-EASED 'normal' in recovery?

Chapter 9. THE FAMILY AFTERWARD page 122
Cessation of drinking is but the FIRST step away
from a HIGHLY STRAINED, ABNORMAL CONDITION.

THE DOCTOR'S OPINION page xxvi
They are restless, irritable and discontented,
unless they can again experience
the sense of ease and comfort
which comes at once by taking a few drinks

So, in other words...no.

If sex is troublesome...

Chapter 5. HOW IT WORKS page 69
We remembered always that our sex powers were God-given
and therefore good,
neither to be used lightly or selfishly
nor to be despised and loathed.

Chapter 5. HOW IT WORKS page 70
If sex is very troublesome,
we throw ourselves the harder into helping others.
We think of their needs and work for them.
This takes us out of ourselves.
It quiets the imperious urge,
when to yield would mean heartache.

Chapter 5. HOW IT WORKS page 70
To sum up about sex:
We earnestly pray for the right ideal,
for guidance in each questionable situation,
for sanity,
and for the strength to do the right thing.

Chapter 5. HOW IT WORKS page 69
In this way we tried to shape a sane and sound ideal for our future sex life.

Chapter 5. HOW IT WORKS page 69
We asked God to mold our ideals
and help us to live up to them.

Chapter 5. HOW IT WORKS page 69
Whatever our ideal turns out to be,
we MUST be willing to grow toward it.

Chapter 5. HOW IT WORKS page 70
If we are not sorry,
and our conduct continues to harm others,
we are quite sure to drink.

The Six Things

The Six Things. To do every day.
1. Check in with a sponsor (ideally,) or another long time sober person. Or a very cool ‘Spiritual Friend’.

2. Phone a newcomer. Give it away to keep it.
THIS IS YOUR MOST POWERFUL DEFENCE AGAINST DRINKING.

3. Hit your knees. Ask YOUR concept of ‘a power greater than yourself’ (It can be the power of AA as a whole, or the power that makes the earth turn) for a sober day, and say thanks at night. It HAS to be a LOVING concept of a HP. (see Trad 2.) If it is even a little bit judgmental, it’s no good. Ask for help with whatever roadblocks you are experiencing at present,

4. Gratitude list. Work against your natural tendency to take things for granted. Is the glass half empty or half full? Write down 6 things that make you laugh, smile or feel glad to be alive.

5. TRY to do one of the things on the just for today card. Think of it as a portable programme. Carry it with you throughout the day. If you become negative, try applying any one of the instructions on the card to your situation.

6. Read a page of the big book or Go to a meeting. Look out for newcomers and long time sober members. Try to be of service in some form or other while at the meeting. If you want to share, sit at the front, and share first. Start with saying I enjoyed your share and I identified with you.

Heres another description of 'The 6 things' I wrote beforehand.
1. Check in with a sponsor (ideally) or another person whos been sober a while

2. Phone a newcomer.
Baby talk.
Give it away to keep it.
Your job is to be of maximum helpfullness. p102

3. Gratitude list.
Work against your natural tendency to take things for granted.
Is the glass half empty or half full?

4. Hit knees morning and night.
(It has to be a loving concept of a HP. If it is even a little bit judgemental, it’s no good.)
Ask for a sober day & say thanks at night.
Ask for help with whatever roadblocks you are experiencing at present,
and ask to be guided to the things you will need to make a good recovery.
The best sponsor for you. The best meetings for you. The best way of doing the steps for you. The best allies.

5. Try to do one of the things on the just for today card.
Carry it with you throughout the day,
if you become negative, go straight to any one of the instructions on the card.

6. Read a page of the big book
or
Go to a meeting
Look out for newcomers and long time sober members.
Try to be of service in some form or other while at the meeting
If you want to share, sit at the front, and share first. Start with saying I enjoyed your share and I identified with you

You are either living in the problem or living in the solution. You can’t do both at the same time.
Do not be discouraged. Progress not perfection. p60

But does it work under pressure?

Chapter 1. BILL'S STORY page 15
The joy of living we REALLY have, even under pressure and difficulty.

Chapter 1. BILL'S STORY page 15
It is a design for living that works in rough going.

Chapter 5. HOW IT WORKS page 68
Just to the extent that we do as we think He would have us,
and humbly rely on Him,
does He enable us to match calamity with serenity.

Chapter 1. BILL'S STORY page 15
On talking to a man there, I would be AMAZINGLY lifted up and set on my feet.

Chapter 7. WORKING WITH OTHERS page 89
It works when other activities fail. (intensive work with other alcoholics.)

Chapter 8. TO WIVES page 104
No situation is too difficult
and no unhappiness too great to be overcome.

Chapter 8. TO WIVES page 116
Time after time, this apparent calamity has been a boon to us,
for it opened up a path which led to the discovery of God.

Are we supposed to be happy in recovery?

Chapter 9. THE FAMILY AFTERWARD page 133
We are SURE God wants us to be happy, joyous, and free.

Chapter 9. THE FAMILY AFTERWARD page 132
We absolutely insist on enjoying life.

Chapter 9. THE FAMILY AFTERWARD page 132
We aren't a glum lot.

Chapter 2. THERE IS A SOLUTION page 25
We have found much of heaven
and we have been rocketed into a fourth dimension of existence of which
we had not even dreamed.

Chapter 1. BILL'S STORY page 15
The joy of living we REALLY have, even under pressure and difficulty.

Chapter 1. BILL'S STORY page 16
There is, however, a VAST amount of FUN about it all.

Chapter 9. THE FAMILY AFTERWARD page 129
Joy at our release from a lifetime of frustration knew no bounds.

Chapter 9. THE FAMILY AFTERWARD page 133
We CANNOT subscribe to the belief that this life is a vale of tears,
though it once was just that for many of us.

Chapter 9. THE FAMILY AFTERWARD page 132
If newcomers could see no joy or fun in our existence, they wouldn't want it.

Chapter 9. THE FAMILY AFTERWARD page 132
We think cheerfulness and laughter make for usefulness.

Chapter 9. THE FAMILY AFTERWARD page 132
Outsiders are sometimes shocked
when we burst into merriment
over a seemingly tragic experience out of the past.
But why shouldn't we laugh?
We have recovered.

Chapter 11. A VISION FOR YOU page 152
The most satisfactory years of your existence lie ahead.

Chapter 11. A VISION FOR YOU page 151
You will find release from care, boredom and worry.
Your imagination will be fired.

Chapter 3. MORE ABOUT ALCOHOLISM page 43
I have since been brought into a way of living infinitely more satisfying
and, I hope, more useful than the life I lived before.
My old manner of life was by no means a bad one,
but I would not exchange its best moments for the worst I have now.
I would not go back to it even if I could."

Chapter 2. THERE IS A SOLUTION page 17
There exists among us a fellowship, a friendliness, and an understanding
which is indescribably wonderful

Chapter 2. THERE IS A SOLUTION page 16
Most of us feel we need look no further for Utopia.
We have it with us right here and now.

Chapter 8. TO WIVES page 117
you are, of course, going to be very happy.

Chapter 1. BILL'S STORY page 17
our joy in escape from disaster does not subside as we go our individual ways.

Chapter 9. THE FAMILY AFTERWARD page 132
Everybody know that those in bad health,
and those who seldom play,
do not laugh much.

Chapter 9. THE FAMILY AFTERWARD page 132
We try not to indulge in cynicism over the state of the nations,
nor do we carry the world's troubles on our shoulders.

Chapter 11. A VISION FOR YOU page 152
Inwardly he would give anything to take half a dozen drinks and get away with them.
He will presently try the old game again,
for he ISN'T HAPPY about his sobriety.

After Step 9, How should we be feeling toward alcohol?

Chapter 6. INTO ACTION page 85
We will seldom be interested in liquor.
If tempted, we recoil from it as from a hot flame.
We react sanely and normally,
and we will find that this has happened automatically.
We will see that our new attitude toward liquor has been given us
without any thought or effort on our part. It just comes!
That is the miracle of it.
We are not fighting it, neither are we avoiding temptation.
We feel as though we had been placed in a position of neutrality safe and protected.
We have not even sworn off.
Instead, the problem has been removed.
It does not exist for us.
We are neither cocky nor are we afraid.
That is our experience.
That is how we react so long as we keep in FIT SPIRITUAL CONDITION.

Does the BB say that we should avoid alcohol after Step 9?

Chapter 7. WORKING WITH OTHERS page 100
Assuming we are SPIRITUALLY FIT, we can do all sorts of things alcoholics are not supposed to do.

Chapter 7. WORKING WITH OTHERS page 101
In our belief
ANY scheme of combating alcoholism
which proposes to shield the sick man from temptation
is doomed to FAILURE.
If the alcoholic tries to shield himself he may succeed for a time,
but usually winds up with a bigger explosion than ever.
We have tried these methods.
These attempts to do the impossible have ALWAYS FAILED.

Chapter 7. WORKING WITH OTHERS page 101
We meet these conditions EVERY DAY.
An alcoholic who cannot meet them, still has an ALCOHOLIC MIND;
there is something the matter with his spiritual status.
His only chance for sobriety would be some place like the Greenland Ice Cap,
and even there an Eskimo might turn up with a bottle of scotch and ruin everything!

Chapter 10. TO EMPLOYERS page 147
If he is conscientiously following the program of recovery
he can go ANYWHERE your business may call him.

Chapter 7. WORKING WITH OTHERS page 102
If you answer these questions satisfactorily,
you need have NO apprehension.

Chapter 2. THERE IS A SOLUTION page 26
But this man still lives, and is a free man.
He does not need a bodyguard nor is he confined.
He can go anywhere on this earth where other from men may go without disaster,
provided he remains willing to maintain a certain simple attitude.

Chapter 6. INTO ACTION page 85
We will seldom be interested in liquor.
If tempted, we recoil from it as from a hot flame.
We react sanely and normally,
and we will find that this has happened automatically.
We will see that our new attitude toward liquor has been given us
without any thought or effort on our part. It just comes!
That is the miracle of it.
We are not fighting it, neither are we avoiding temptation.
We feel as though we had been placed in a position of neutrality safe and protected.
We have not even sworn off.
Instead, the problem has been removed.
It does not exist for us.
We are neither cocky nor are we afraid.
That is our experience.
That is how we react so long as we keep in FIT SPIRITUAL CONDITION.

Does the BB say that simply not drinking is enough?

Chapter 6. INTO ACTION page 82
We feel a man is unthinking when he says that sobriety is enough.

Chapter 2. THERE IS A SOLUTION page 19
We feel that elimination of our drinking is but a beginning.

Chapter 11. A VISION FOR YOU page 152
Now and then a serious drinker, being DRY at the moment says,
"I don't miss it at all. Feel better. Work better. Having a better time."
As ex-problem drinkers, we smile at such a sally.
We know our friend is like a boy whistling in the dark to keep up his spirits.
He fools himself.
Inwardly he would give anything to take half a dozen drinks and get away with them.
He will presently try the old game again, for he isn't happy about his sobriety.
He cannot picture life without alcohol.
Some day he will be unable to imagine life either with alcohol or without it.
Then he will know loneliness such as few do.
He will be at the jumping-off place.
He will wish for the end.

Looks like a resounding NO then!

Identifiying the 'Prayers' in the Big Book

Step Three Prayer
Chapter 5. HOW IT WORKS page 63
God, I offer myself to Thee --
to build with me and to do with me as Thou wilt.
Relieve me of the bondage of self,
that I may better do Thy will.
Take away my difficulties,
that victory over them
may bear witness to those I would help
of Thy Power, Thy Love, and Thy Way of life.
May I do Thy will always!

Step Seven Prayer
Chapter 6. INTO ACTION page 76
My Creator,
I am now willing that you should have all of me,
good and bad.
I pray that you now remove from me
every single defect of character
which stands in the way of my usefulness to you and my fellows.
Grant me strength, as I go out from here,
to do your bidding.
Amen.

Chapter 5. HOW IT WORKS page 70
To sum up about sex:
We earnestly pray for the right ideal,
for guidance in each questionable situation,
for sanity,
and for the strength to do the right thing.

Chapter 6. INTO ACTION page 85
How can I best serve Thee?,
Thy will (not mine) be done."
These are thoughts which MUST go with us CONSTANTLY.

Chapter 1. BILL'S STORY page 13
I was to sit quietly when in doubt,
asking only for direction and strength to meet my problems
as He would have me.
Never was I to pray for myself,
except as my requests bore on my usefulness to others.
Then only might I expect to receive.
But that would be in great measure.

Chapter 5. HOW IT WORKS
page 59
Sought through prayer and meditation
to improve our conscious contact with God
as we understood Him ,
praying only for knowledge of His will for us
and the power to carry that out.

Chapter 6. INTO ACTION
page 86
Before we begin,
we ask God to direct our thinking,
especially asking that it be divorced from self-pity,
dishonest or self-seeking motives.

Identifiying the 'Case histories' in the Big Book

What does a 'Spiritual Awakening' look like?

Carl Jungs description of a spiritual awakening.
p27
Once in a while, alcoholics have had what are
called vital spiritual experiences. To me these occurrences are phenomena.
They appear to be in the nature of
huge emotional displacements and rearrangements.
Ideas, emotions, and attitudes which were once the guiding forces of the lives of these men are suddenly cast to one side, and
a completely new set of conceptions and motives begin to dominate them.

Identifiying the negative 'Promises' in the Big Book

Identifiying the 'Identification' in the Big Book

Identifiying the 'Instructions' in the Big Book

Identifiying the 'Promises' in the Big Book

How can I realistically practice 'constant thought of others'?

Why 'CONSTANT thought of others'?

Chapter 2. THERE IS A SOLUTION page 20
Our very lives, as ex-problem drinkers, depend upon our CONSTANT thought of others and how we may help meet their needs.

Chapter 1. BILL'S STORY page 15
If an alcoholic failed to perfect and enlarge his spiritual life through work and self-sacrifice for others, he could NOT survive the CERTAIN trials and low spots ahead.

Chapter 1. BILL'S STORY page 14
Particularly it was it IMPERATIVE to work with others
as he had worked with me.
Faith without works was dead, he said.

Chapter 11. A VISION FOR YOU page 159
They knew they MUST help other alcoholics
if they would remain sober

..and God WILL keep you unharmed

Chapter 7. WORKING WITH OTHERS page 102
Keep on the firing line of life with these motives and God will keep you unharmed.

'Maximum Helpfulness' for steering ones life

What is the most powerful antidote to mental illness?

Honesty.
Or the CAPACITY for Honesty.

Chapter 5. HOW IT WORKS
p58
There are those, too, who suffer from GRAVE emotional and mental disorders, but many of them DO recover if they have the capacity to be HONEST.

Chapter 9. THE FAMILY AFTERWARD
page 133
We, who have recovered from serious drinking, are MIRACLES of mental health.

Doesn't say, 'except for Mary or James'

Therefore, if you want relief from your 'mental and emotional disorders'
Then you should aim to INCREASE your CAPACITY for Honesty,
or your ability to be Honest 'in all your affairs'

Some examples of DIShonesty might be:
Any INDIRECT form of communication
Manipulation
Guilt manipulation
Blame
Living in the future. Or not being in the moment, which is the only thing we can really know about
Sarcasm. Because its an indirect way of being angry.
Being Phony or Fake
Being Gushy or over-sentimental.
Being insincere
Talking the talk, but not walking the walk.
Saying something and doing something else
Betrayal
Infidelity
Cheating
Blatant lies
Not admitting you were wrong
Affairs
White Lies
Saying anything you do not mean, even if it is a compliment.
Over complimentary, obsequious, flattering, buttering people up.
Never disagreeing with people
Being a wimp.
Being influenced by peer pressure. I.e.: Not being true to oneself.

Some examples of Honesty might be:
Being in the moment. Because we do not know the future. It is a fiction, yet to be realized.
A sense of personal responsibility. Because it IS the truth.
Integrity.
Boldness and courage to be yourself. 'To thine own self be true'
Steadiness of personality. Able to hold one's own amidst outside influences.
Saying EXACTLY what you are thinking. In a SKILLFUL and CONSIDERATE fashion.
Being Authentic
Monitoring your tone of voice, so that it more accurately conveys what you are trying to communicate.
Not 'editing' your thoughts. -Considerately!
Holding NOTHING back.
Broadcasting (to your fellow man) whatever troubles you. Promptly! And in a considerate fashion.
- Because you are as sick as your secrets.
Being guileless. Not playing 'games' or having a 'strategy'
Being transparent. Having no 'front'.