About Me

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I have recovered from the disease of Alcoholism. I believe there is only one person really,.. everybody. And that peace of mind is everything. -So treat your neighbor as you would treat yourself, because your neighbor IS yourself. I think most of recovery is what I would call common sense, but that learning to be ordinary is a true gift very few people acquire. My ambition is to accept everything unflinchingly, with compassion, and therefore be intrinsically comfortable in my own skin, no matter what. I am comfortable being uncomfortable and am willing to go to any lengths to improve my life. I believe the Big Book was divinely inspired, and is extraordinarily powerful. Unfortunately AA's best kept secret a lot of the time. (In my opinion). I just try to do what works, no matter what it is.

Sunday, December 31, 2006

Happy new year, and all that stuff.. I have FREE cyber cake! Cool!

Cool. If you put your name in here, you get a free slice of cyber cake and a cyber coffee!! Excellent! You can't beat a freebie!

As far as I can tell it will be 20 yrs on the 1st Jan since I had an alcoholic drink! Cool! I cant even remember when exactly I stopped drinking, as I was not drinking every day at the time I decided to stop, Pretty infrequently actually. On the occasions when I DID drink, I was trying to cut down to see if I could control it that way. Needless to say it didn't work! So it could have been a few days before 1st Jan for all I know. Whatever. I just call it 1st Jan 87.
I had been going to Al Anon regularly, and somehow or other bumped into some 12 step therapists along my (miserable) way who asked me about my drinking, and told me to stop drinking and go to 6 aa meetings. So I did! Funny!
Anyway all I can remember was that it had been mulling this over in my brain for some time, and I figured I should give this 'not drinking' thing a go at some point, and new year seemed as good a time as any. So I kind of decided to knock it on the head in the new year.
I know it doesn't sound very dramatic, but that's because it wasn't. I was suffering, no doubt about that, but I just got lucky and managed to identify my problem with alcohol at a very early stage of my drinking career. Half the time I don't even remember how long it is since I had a drink. I really don't give it a lot of thought. Drink just doesn't seem like an issue now.
Anyway although I was lucky to get it early, I had suffered a great deal with alcohol before that point, which is why the therapists were so resolute in their judgment about me not drinking! So I'm not really a 'high bottom'. I have paid my dues! I may not have reached a point where I had a compulsion to drink every day, but things were pretty bad. More in the sense of 'cancer of the soul'. I think this is one of the main reasons I am so drawn to peace of mind/joy in recovery. I know pain FAR too well!! Anyway, Just thought I'd share that with you!

I figured I'd post this before I head out to a silly old aa new year thing in town. Actually its not that crummy, but I always think of aa things as being a bit crummy, on account of the fact they are a bit 'low rent', compared to the TOTALLY swanky places in town. Anyway, I quite like the 'low rent' thing, every now and then. I very rarely go to these things, but as a bunch of former Sponsees (I really have to start referring to them as former Sponsees!) were going, it seemed like a nice idea. I see aa things as being very harmless in the main. It's just getting there will be a pain, as its a bit ! Windy and rainy out there! Bleh!

Anyway, I am very gratified with the progress of my now sponsorless, former Sponsees. My work is done!! I bumped into some today and they are doing as well as I did post-9th without a sponsor. Perfect! I'm very happy, as I deviated from the norm of my former home group on that issue. On the basis that it had worked out for me, I felt it was only right to pass that on to them, seeing as how they had dutifully done all the same things I did, so logic would suppose that they ought to have the same experience as myself without a sponsor. What I mean is it was a bit of a social experiment based on the results I had achieved. Anyway, I'm just very glad that they are happy, well adjusted individuals getting on with their lives. I spoke to a good few today, and I am always impressed by how well they are getting on. I love their new found independence. I am very happy being a sponsor free person, and it makes me happy that I am able to share that ability with them. I only mention that because I don't see them very often at all as I am wrapped up in study usually.

At the moment I'm very tempted to start another blog just for my study subjects and let this one languish for a while, as this one can be VERY distracting. It's very hard for me to read posts about people who are suffering, and not respond to them in some form or other. Very difficult! It;s just I have a raft of other academic problems to sort out right now, and am still behind. I am pretty sure even if I spent all my time trying to figure out this subject it would still be possible to do more. Like in aa, the possibilities for interpretation in this subject are endless!
Who know. I'm sure I will figure it out! I've still got LOADS of work to do!! Busy busy busy!!

Anyway I'd better be getting off. Too long as usual! Have a VERY positive and fulfilling new year you guys!


Pammie said...

Now THAT'S what I'm talking ABOUT!
Thanks for posting that. We MUST hear of all the different ways people got sober....so that we find someone we identify with. I hear people say "well, I wasn't drinking everyday, so I must not be an alcoholic"...thank you for showing us that we all come in "different" packages. I hope you have a great evening!!

Rex said...

Happy New Year!!!

Judith said...

Happy new year! Thank you for your wonderful posts & great advice. Hope you accomplish everything you set out to do this year and more :)

Best wishes,

Gooey Munster said...

Happy New Year!!!

When I first got sober I did the comaprison game. I listened to others that had been dragged thru Hell and back and felt guilty, almost like I was not workthy of having a seat in AA. However I hurt, and was broken and empty inside. I did not have to loose everything to finally surrender. I was lost inside, and dying, it was enough to begin walking differenlty.

Thank you for sharing this, and conrats on 20 years. Thank you for leading the foot steps for others to follow and most importantly, working with others.

Have a beautiful New Year.