Perhaps you think you're "Not that bad": 'Yets' and The PROGRESSIVE nature of this illness

if you are sick and tired of being sick and tired, you will be able to do WHATEVER you need to do to get well. But when people don't grasp step one very well, they can be a bit ambivalent about the programme and have no real sense of urgency about getting well. They can still see some options or mileage with drinking.

In many ways I was a very ''high bottom' when I as new. I was not at a point in my drinking career where I needed to drink every day, or even every month. I could stop for long periods like the 'carpet slippers and a bottle' fellow in the big book. I had no physical symptoms. My liver hadn't packed in. I wasn't incontinent. But I HAD reached an unbearably agonizing emotional and mental rock bottom and I was willing to do ANYTHING to get well. Nothing you could suggest would be more awful than what I was feeling, so it wasn't a problem.

Sometimes people need to suffer a bit more before they start taking this disease seriously. Sometimes people can only acknowledge its power when it takes EVERYTHING away from them. Including their job, and their ability to earn a living. Often the job is the last thing to go. It's the thing that convinces them that there really IS something horribly wrong.

With some newcomers, their ability to earn a living gives them a false sense of security (especially if they are reasonably professional) and make them think they're 'not that bad'. Ie they won't lose eve-ry-thing. they wont lose their ability to earn a living, mind ! or control of their bladder. That happens to 'other' people. Basically, the more skilled they are, the more they struggle with grasping their GREATEST weakness, their inability to stop or control their drinking. Or in cases like mine, how they fall apart and lose everything with or without alcohol. (That's the insanity option by the way!)
(It doesn't ALWAYS happen like that though. I have spoken with park bench homeless old men (for instance) who thought THEY were 'not that bad', so its a fairly universal condition! Denial is the same, no matter what your personal circumstances!)

Anyway, the reason I say this is because this is a PROGRESSIVE illness, and those things are 'yets' I'm afraid. Yes. Even for skilled, competent, intelligent, professional, capable people. For everybody! I know SO many VERY ! skilled VERY competent people who were brought to their KNEES with this thing. Reputation and intelligence don't put this disease in remission any more than they put cancer in remission. So those things, although nice to have, will not save you.

I am COMPLETLY powerless over the point at which people 'see' the grave nature of this disease. I would LOVE to be able to 'make' people have a 'proper' rock bottom. But it's NONE OF MY BUSINESS when that happens. Oh well. I find step one the MOST hard work with Sponsees. REALLY hard work! There is a LOT of work to do in terms of understanding what the implications of having this disease really means. Its a VERY bleak prospect if you really understand it. Step one is a downer really! But I always see that as a really healthy sign. Personally I think an incomplete understanding of the implications of the illness makes for a VERY shaky foundation to the programme of recovery. But that's just my view of what I've observed working in myself and with others.

Whatever! Have yourselves a cool Thursday!